Our Family
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
The great sadness
Well, it is almost that time again...after an amazing few months in the states, it is time for goodbyes. One month left and I can feel it in every conversation, every moment spent with others, every time I eat...my mind reminds me that it may be the last time for a while. I believe that feeling has a noun...the great sadness...I find myself holding back tears as I have conversations with others,trying to avoid the great sadness that is hanging in the reminder that we will soon be apart again and all hearts will be broken. When alone, I find myself in tears as I imagine the lives of Wyatt and Tate away from the places we call home. Today, as I was wrestling with this incredible sadness these sweet lyrics came to mind; "greater things have yet to come and greater things are still to be done in this city". Whew! So I fell before the lord... Wyatt has a small a vocabulary but one word he has learned rather quickly is "ouch". It doesn't take much more than that one simple word for me to find the hurt and do my best to help. Well, today in my brokenness, all I could say is "ouch". And then I felt him gently remind me that obedience is better than sacrifice and that he is enough...He was, He is, and He will forever be. blessed be the name. So we have about four more weeks and people keep asking me how they can pray. I can't tell them without crying so I just give generic answers, but the truth is to pray for strength to survive and find His joy and peace during this time of incredible sadness. Perhaps many of you reading this see it as dramatic and think...Lindsey, no one has died...good grief. But I do feel as if something is dying...it is time. The mourning is for years that will pass and the memories that will be missed and the death of dreams that our families will be able to enjoy the sweet toddlers that we will be raising for the next few years. Is it worth it? No doubt. Is it hard? More than words. So please prAy for this time of mourning as our families and close friends wade through the great sadness that surrounds us all as we face goodbye once again.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
My heart is right there with you! All the feelings I am having and can't put into words!
ReplyDeleteSo beautifully and honestly said, Lindsey. Praying for you.
ReplyDeleteI love your heart and I KNOW that you are not being dramatic - just real. Much love!
ReplyDeletePraying for you and your sweet family!
ReplyDeleteOH Lindsey...my breaks right along with you. Knowing exactly the way you feel, I know the anxiety and fear that goes along with knowing you have to say goodbye. We will be praying for exactly what you asked. Know we love you guys and wish we could make it easier for you. :( Hope to see yall before you leave.
ReplyDeleteLindsey, my heart cries out for you right now. While I have never lived overseas, I have always lived away from my family. The hardest time was when my dad was terminally ill. Every time I saw him I wondered if it would be my last. I tried to think of anything I needed to say or do, knowing that I couldn't just get to him in a moment's notice. I felt so guilty, but I knew by faith and by the trustworthiness of His word that my place was with Dave and wherever He had called us to serve. I will say, however, that when we were together God multiplied our time together and gave us great memories. He also did neat things in the lives of our family members as they saw us treasuring Christ above all else. I promise you, I will pray. I know you hurt as a daughter and as a mom. Janet Anglin
ReplyDelete